Farewell Phil. We'll miss you.

How can you hate a person who created something so awesome?

So that's it then. The trolls have won. Phil Fish has cancelled Fez II and is leaving the industry. All because of a sustained campaign of hate by a vocal minority who for some unknown reason, see fit to call themselves 'gamers'. Why do we allow the worst of our community to have the loudest voices and ruin it for the rest of us? Not only that, why do we allow these people to perpetuate the negative stereotypes of people who would rather partake of something interactive for a couple of hours after work rather than switch off their brains and watch gloom and doom soap operas all night?

I love Fez. It's one of my favourite games of this generation. No title that I have played in the last five years has given me such a wide eyed sense of discovery with every new screen or been as full of genuine whimsy as Fez. Nor has any other game had such a unique central mechanic. I was excited to see where Polytron would take the sequel. I was excited about the prospect of new worlds, new discoveries and evolved play mechanics. Now, thanks to a few self righteous asshats, I'll never have the chance.

Sure, Phil Fish was abrasive. But personally I found him entertaining. He's brusque, forthright, and unfiltered, and he was, up until last night at least, perfectly happy to stand up to his detractors. If you don't like that, then so what? Stay away from his Twitter feed. It's not difficult. I was bought up to just not associate myself with people I don't like, not persistently hound someone anonymously over the internet until you force them to stop doing something they love just so they can escape the constant abuse. We had a word for that at school. Bullying. And just because you're not in school anymore, it doesn't mean the description doesn't apply.

Depending on your perspective, Trolls live under bridges and eat goats, or they're a species made of rock who get a bit thick when it gets hot because their brains are made of silicon. They don't fill the internet with anonymous hate. It's time we stopped associating self righteous, hate filled, abusive assholes with fictional creatures and started calling them what they really are. Bullies.

They're winning and we shouldn't be allowing them to. And now they've forced one of the few genuine innovators out of the games industry because they've taken umbrage over his personality. So here's what I have to say to them.

Thanks for killing a potentially great game. I hope you're real fucking proud of yourselves, wankstains.

Blasphemy!

If saying you dislike Mario Kart 64 is some kind of gaming blasphemy then I'm going straight to hell. I won't pass go, and I won't collect £200, because it's something I say almost as soon as it's name is mentioned within my earshot, which happens surprisingly often. Mario Kart 64 is just one of those games I never gelled with. I never got used to the handling and I find its selection of tracks frustrating. Consequently, I'm so rarely any good at it that when I miraculously make it to the front of the race only to be blue shelled into last, it makes me think that the game is designed to punish you for being any good at it. It's not of course, and this is the point where the people who love Mario Kart 64, i.e, everyone in the world but me, start shouting that my criticisms are dumb, and that it's one of the best multiplayer racers ever made. Those people are right of course, and I agree with them. What makes my dislike of Mario Kart 64 so weird is that I'll quite happily play, and have fun with every other Mario Kart game ever made, particularly the Wii and GBA versions.

It's probably the most significant example I can find of my seemingly irrational ambivalence towards some titles that many gamers feel are sacred. It crops up so often that sometimes I start worrying that I might be going off the concept of fun. I'm not (hopefully), but it feels that way. There are others too. Concerningly, two of the other series I just cannot get on with feature also Mario in one way or another. Let's start with the Mario Party series, which for me is a collection of genuinely fun mini games that are utterly ruined by both the boardgame segment that needlessly drags the length of the game out, and possibly the worst way of deciding a game's winner ever devised. Of course, I'm referring to the detestable star system that means no matter how many of the damn things you've collected, you're almost guaranteed to be knocked off the top spot when the game arbitrarily awards stars on the results screen to other players for seemingly no other reason than that they've participated. Just thinking about it gets me riled up.

Mario's core platformers also do absolutely nothing for me. I've tried so hard to love him, I really have, but I just can't bring myself to care that I haven't beaten a single Super Mario game. Not one. Not even Super Mario Bros on the NES. In fact I haven't touched a Mario game since Sunshine, and it doesn't bother me in the slightest. I've decided to just stop trying now, even though I know I'm denying myself the opportunity to play Super Mario Galaxies 1 and 2, which are renowned as two of the best and most innovative platformers of recent times. Worst of all, unlike Mario Kart 64 and Mario Party, I'm completely at a loss for a way to explain why I don't 'get' Mario's platformers. The control is always tight, the level design is always clever, the worlds are full of personality and the game mechanics are almost always innovative in one way or another. These are all things that we all look for in a good game, and Mario games are never hailed as merely 'good' games. In fact, the only legitimate criticism I can level at his games is this; the story is a bit naff, and since when has story ever really mattered in a Super Mario game?

The cynics amongst you will dismiss this as just another round of Nintendo bashing, but the thing is, I think most of the stuff they put out is fantastic. I've played every Zelda game since A Link to the Past and I've loved them. I rate the Metroid Prime series as one of the best console FPSs ever made. I've racked up months of play in the three Smash Bros games. I played F-Zeroes X and GX until the cows came home. I caught all 251 Pokemon in Gold and Silver and battled them in Stadium 2 on the N64. While my town thrived in Animal Crossing, I've commanded Pikmin, adventured with Kirby, got hooked on WarioWare. And despite everything I said about Mario above, I've visited and liked Super Mario World 2, with it's cute crayon aesthetic and it's cuddly Yoshis.

So it's not just simple Nintendo Bashing. Besides, I have trouble with some of gaming's other sacred cows too.

Sacred cattle like Metal Gear Solid 4. The more I play it, the more it makes me rant about it. I'm trying so hard to persevere with it because I know about Shadow Moses and I want to wrap up the story I started in the first Metal Gear Solid all those years ago. I know what it is about Metal Gear 4 that turns me off it and I'm trying to work around it. I've loved every other Metal Gear I've ever played, and I'm used to pointlessly long cutscenes and campy plot nonsense. It's part of the fun after all, but I just can't get on with the fourth instalment's wonky pacing. It seems you can't take more than a dozen steps without getting a discourse on PMCs, proxy wars or how war has changed. Then there are the half hour movies between missions aboard the aeroplane. I just want to sneak past soldiers and take down giant robots Hideo-san, why won't you let me? I will finish Metal Gear 4 before this generation is out. I need to find out what happens to Old Snake. I might eventually enjoy it too, but I'm not getting the feeling that I'll find that an easy thing to do.

Then there is the whole Call of Duty/Battlefield/Halo thing. I love first person shooters. I've spent hours gushing about Bioshock, Half Life, Metro and Unreal Tournament but I just can't bring myself to play any of the triumvirate of shooters that dominate the current console landscape. I've played a bit of Halo 3, but not since Bungie took Rocket Race out of it's online mode. I played the first Call of Duty not long after I completed Medal of Honour: Allied Assault on the PC. Call it war game fatigue perhaps, but CoD did nothing for me, and I've ignored them ever since. I know the Modern Warfare series is a thrillride, but most of what I've seen of the single player modes seems to involve holding down the fire button while you strut down a corridor to the next explosive setpiece. Frankly it looks dumb, and it doesn't get any better in multiplayer. I saw ten seconds of the now infamous CoD Rage Montage on youtube and decided that I'd been avoiding these games for a good reason. I don't want to be associated in any way with that kind of gamer. I'm a peaceable kind of guy. This mainly results in me being looked at like I've got some kind of horrible facial disfigurement whenever it comes up in conversation.

Where Halo is concerned, I just find it really reductive, with it's recharging health and two guns only multiplayer. After spending my formative years with Unreal Tournament and Quake III the slower pace and slimmer weapon choice of Halo sucks all the fun away for me. Some of the best moments in UT came from surviving an encounter by the skin of your teeth, then scoring a double kill with a lucky shock combo while you were hanging desperately on to that last sliver of health. Recharging shields have put an end to that. Also, I liked being able to grab the rocket launcher and not have to worry about whether to drop the flak cannon or the shock rifle, because you could carry all the guns. Older multiplayer shooters made me feel like a hero, Halo doesn't. On the single player front, Halo frustrates me because Bungie has created some really, really rich lore for their sci-fi universe, as evidenced in the enjoyable (and much better than they have any right to be) Halo novels. But all that story seems to get pushed into the background when you play it. I can remember a whole lot about the story of Half Life 2, yet I honestly can't remember a single plot detail of Halo 3, such is the poor quality of Halo's storytelling.

All of this makes me sound like some kind of mop topped holier than thou indie gaming hipster, punching this out on my laptop from behind a set of thick rimmed lensless NHS glasses, and I'm really not. I mean, I like Fez as much as the next person, but there's nothing out there that scratches the itch like a really great triple A blockbuster. Indie might be where all the imagination is, but triple A boxed games are where the big thrills lie. I like to think there's room in my life for both. Maybe it's age, my tastes growing more fickle as I edge nearer to thirty. Perhaps there are others out there who have the weird gaming pet hates of their own but all I know is this. I seem to have an irrational disconnect with some of gaming's most respected names, and you can try as hard as you like to convince me to give them a chance, but you probably won't change my mind. If you can't understand why I have these problems with certain games that are supposed to be beyond criticism, don't worry about it, because I'm not so sure of the reasons either.

If I ever work it out, I'll be sure to let you know.

In appreciation of: Phil Fish

Phil Fish seems to be getting a lot of hate at the moment. This was bought to my attention when I spotted a tweet from CliffyB highlighting the fact. For those who don't know the story, here's how it goes.

It seems that Fish has an entourage of haters, a bunch of people who take pleasure in criticism and say stuff about boycotting Fez because they think he's an asshole. To which Phil Fish replied this, "Fez is number one on Steam right now and it's not even out yet. You should boycott harder, nerds." So, giving as good as he gets then. Needless to say there was a bit of forum rage, and people started calling for a boycott again. Frankly the forum trolls need to grow up. Phil Fish is not Activision or EA, two companies whom you have every right to hate. No, he's just a guy, a guy who made a game whom some corners of the internet seem to have a problem with, a guy who isn't a PR mouthpiece. So what if he comes across as a prickly auteur? It's his game, he has every right to be. He's speaking to the trolls in their own language. Of course they're not going to like it.

Phil Fish, however prickly or unpleasant a person he may or may not be, is a personality, and one who can speak like a human rather than a PR robot at that. Gaming needs more personalities. Excluding Phil Fish, I can count the amount of big gaming Names I can reel off from the top of my head on one hand. Miyamoto, Kojima, Cliffy B, Jon Blow, Rhianna Pratchett. So he's a pantomime villain to the trolls? So what? He's an indie dev so he can speak his mind without having to worry what the suits think, and it's fun to watch him spar with his critics. I'd like to see more people like him. Also whatever his personality flaws, Fez is a truly great game, and to stop yourself from playing it, just because you don't like the developer is simply cutting off your nose to spite your face.

To put it another way. Did you boycott Django Unchained after seeing Quentin Tarantino's now famous Channel 4 interview with Krishnan Guru Murthy? Thought not. It doesn't matter if he's a bit of a dick, the fact is Tarantino's movies are great, so you go and see them anyway. The same applies to Clint Eastwood movies, or any number of musicians. Of course, you have to draw the line somewhere. It's not ok to like Roman Polanski movies or the Lostprophets. Save the boycotts for the real assholes, not for the guy who just said something that you've taken umbrage with.

Now stop trolling and go play Fez. You'll thank yourself for it.

The Round Up

Last night wrapped up 2012, and while it's a little late, I wouldn't be much of a blogger if I didn't pull out a list of my favourite games of the year gone by.

Being a normal guy with a normal job means I sadly can't afford every single one of the big releases of the year. Nor do I have the time to play them, so my list is restricted to games that I actually finished. It's not a definitive best of. You won't find the likes of Far Cry 3, Forza Horizon or Tekken Tag 2 here, as much as I'd like them to be. Since I haven't actually got those games yet, including them would be a bit of a sham, no matter how well they reviewed. Think of the run down below as a round up of my favourites of the new releases that I managed to play over the the past year. So, let's start with numero uno.

The Walking Dead.

Everything that can be said about The Walking Dead as a game has already been said, some of it even by me. It's won more game of the year awards than it's possible to count and it's all justified. From its superlative voice acting, to its affecting story, its sledgehammer ending and its fantastic (nearly) mainstream revival of old school point and click mechanics, almost everything in The Walking Dead makes it a work of genius. But for me, the best part apart from all of that was the episodic release model. By ending each episode on a cliff hanger and making us wait for the next, The Walking Dead was a near constant conversation point between my friends. Sitting over a beer, discussing plot points, characters, where we thought the story might go, the decisions we made, why we made them and how bad that made us as people was almost as great as the experience of the game itself. I can't wait for season 2.

Dishonored.

Winner of all of the game of the year awards not given to The Walking Dead or Journey, and rightly so. I've blogged about Dishonored in the past, so I'll try not to repeat myself.

Dishonored is a triumph. It absolutely nails what I consider to be the three pillars that hold up a great game, gameplay, setting and story. The game gives you pretty much free rein in how you approach it's missions. It encourages you to experiment with its systems and often rewards you for it. The city of Dunwall grounds the game in a richly imagined universe with a sense of place that rivals any game out there, and in my personal opinion is probably the best gaming setting since that of Half Life 2. It's beautiful too, with art liberally hung upon Dunwall's virtual walls and the city looking almost like a painting itself. On the story front, it's a time honored tale of betrayal, redemption and rescue, simple yet effective, and barely hampered at all by the silent protagonist's near complete lack of personality. The fact that the only thing I can find to rant about is Dishonored's silent protagonist shows the quality of this fabulous game. If you haven't played it already, I urge you to.

Fez.

No enemies, no peril, no game over screen. Despite it's sometimes fiendish puzzles, and the tetris block language that I'll probably never be able to translate, Fez is the most relaxing gaming experience I've had all year. There is literally just you and a massive world to explore and decypher. I loved its retro look. I loved its soothing chiptune soundtrack. I loved the clever gameplay hook that lets you rotate the world around the x-axis. Fez is about as indie as they come and all the better for it. I love it dearly.

Trials Evolution.

My secret stash of gaming crack cunningly disguised as a fridge-full of my gaming comfort food. Whenever there is doubt about what to play there is one answer. Trials. What starts as a simple racer quickly becomes a relentlessly addictive one-more-go motorcycle based platformer that eventually morphs into a how-the-hell-do-I-get-up-that motorcycle based puzzle game. No matter how many times Trials evolution beats me around the face with its sometimes extreme difficulty, I always wind up coming back for more. I'm an addict.

Jet Set Radio.

Yes, it's a re-release of a decade old Dreamcast game. Yes, the gameplay is a bit ropey sometimes. Yes, there's a huge difficulty spike at the Noise Tanks level. No, I don't care about any of that. Jet Set Radio is a classic. Period. If ever there was a game that was greater than the sum of its parts, JSR is it.

Its wildly stylized look means it has aged remarkably well, the soundtrack remains awesome and you can skate up behind a cop and graffiti his back. Despite sometimes clunky controls and the complete lack of a free camera, Tokyo-to is a joy to inhabit. Virtually tagging a wall and then running away from the cops while they chase you in tanks and helicopters is an experience I can recommend to everyone.

Dust.

One of the stand out indie games of the year. Dust is beautiful to behold, a joy to play, and the owner of a surprisingly good story. The combat and exploration both surprised me with their depth, and the fact that most of it is the work of just one person is even more impressive. Dust itself is just the first part of a larger story set in the world of the game. Personally I hope this means more games, because I'd happily buy them. If you overlooked Dust on release, download the trial. You'll thank yourself for it.

SSX.

Ahh, SSX. Always reliably amazing on the PS2, I owned every game in the original series bar SSX Blur and loved every one of them. The combination of ludicrous stunts, larger than life characters, festival atmosphere and consistently incredible licensed soundtracks made for a near perfect gaming experience. Suffice to say, I was very excited when I got my paws on a copy of the new SSX. Initially I was bitterly disappointed. Gone was the festival atmosphere, gone were the huge personalities, gone was the old control system that I knew so well. It was jarring. The difficulty didn't help either. At first it seemed like all that was left of SSX was a another great soundtrack and a bunch of snowboards. All of a sudden though, at the point that I was giving up trying to like it, SSX clicked. I slipped into the flow state so easily entered in the old games and SSX came back to me. Massive air was obtained, monster tricks were busted, helicopters stalled upon, wingsuits deployed. Somewhere under all the new stuff, I found SSX's old soul, and when I brought it back into the daylight, that old soul burned as brightly as it ever had in SSX's illustrious past. I'm still playing it, on and off, nearly a year after I first started it. Long live the king of extreme sports games.

So there you have it, my personal favourites of 2012. My only regret is that I couldn't afford to buy the rest of the great games that came out over the year, but oh well, I'll catch up eventually. Also, to those wondering why Journey isn't on the list, my answer is that I fervently wish it was, but I don't own a PS3 and my girlfriend hasn't downloaded it on hers yet. I know it's a rubbish excuse, but it's the best I have.

I end with an Honorable Mention. A game that is so not eligible for this list it's a joke, but it provided some of the best moments around a console with my mates all year. That game is:

Circuit Breakers.

Greatest multiplayer game known to man. In possession of a totally level playing field. Capacity to win totally reliant upon ones own skill, luck, sheer mean spiritedness and ability to smack talk. Cause of many arguments. Settlement of none. Track a copy down, slap it in your PS3, pair up four pads and prepare to call Bullshit on the guy who knocked you off on the last corner to claim victory. The most fun you can have with three other people while keeping your clothes on.